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I work down at the Pizza Pit And I drive an old Hyundai I still live with my mom and dad I'm 5 foot 3 and overweight I'm a scifi fanatic A mild asthmatic And I've never been to second base But there's whole ‘nother me That you need to see Go checkout MySpace 'Cause online I'm out in Hollywood I'm 6 foot 5 and I look damn good I drive a Maserati I'm a black-belt in karate And I love a good glass of wine It turns girls on that I’m mysterious I tell them I don't want nothing serious 'Cause even on a slow day I could have a three way Chat with two women at one time I’m so much cooler online So much cooler online When I get home I kiss my mom And she fixes me a snack And I head down to my basement bedroom And fire up my Mac In real life the only time I’ve ever even been to L.A Is when I got the chance with the marching band To play tuba in the Rose Parade Online I live in Malibu I pose for Calvin Klein, I've been in GQ I'm single and I'm rich And I've got a set of six pack abs that would blow your mind It turns girls on that I’m mysterious I tell them I don't want nothing serious 'Cause even on a slow day I could have a three way Chat with two women at one time I’m so much cooler online So much cooler online When you got my kind of stats It’s hard to get a date Let alone a real girlfriend But I grow another foot and I lose a bunch of weight Every time I login Online I’m out in Hollywood I’m 6 foot 5 and I look damn good Even on a slow day I could have a three way Chat with two women at one time I’m so much cooler online Yeah, I’m cooler online I’m so much cooler online Yeah, I’m cooler online Yeah, I’m cooler online Yeah, I’ll see ya online |